Free Time Chic

news.

2011-02-18T11:13:00.001-08:00

i have no free time. but i do live in new york now!

Canning some wicked jam.

2010-01-08T10:02:00.000-08:00

The holidays are over, but citrus season is not. Because money isn't falling out of my ears (that would be gross anyway), I decided to get super crafty this year when it came to gifts. I recruited a special pal who has experience canning jam. FYI, non-perishable jam needs to be sealed and all items needs to be sterilized. My friend had doused her kitchen in boiling water and I brought the sharp knives. We ventured out to Berkeley Bowl for some fruit, in this case about 8 lbs of blood oranges and a 1/2 lb of Meyer lemons. After returned to her house, we rinsed the fruit and using a vegetable peeler, cut the colored part from 2 lemons and 4 oranges.

Then we finely diced the peel and put 2 tablespoons of the lemon peel and 6 tablespoons of the orange peel and 1 cup of water in a 6-8 quart pan. The rest of the peel is unnecessary.

With a sharp knife, we carefully peeled all of the white crap off of the fruit and cut the lemons and 10 oranges into chunks, trying to keep all of those pesky seeds out of the "good" bowl.

Take the fruit in the "good" bowl and puree them in a food processor until you have 2 cups that are smoothly blended. Pour this into the pan with the diced peel. Puree remaining fruit and put it through a fine strainer to extract juice. Juice the rest of the fruit until you have a total of 4 cups. We had to go get more fruit at this point because some fruit aint so juicy! Take this pan and boil it on high heat stirring a LOT until it's reduced to about 5 cups total, or for about 10 minutes. Now the pectin, mix it (a 1.75 oz pkg) with a 1/4 cup of sugar and add it to the pan. Stir on high until it starts to boil rapidly. Add 4 cups of sugar to the pan and stir until it returns to a boil. Now watch the clock for one minute and remove it from the heat.

Now using a sterilized spoon or ladle, scoop the mixture into clean canning jars.

Leave about 1/8 inch of room at the top, wipe jar rims clean and set a sterilized flat lid on each jar, screw on lids. All of these pieces should have been resting in a boiling pot of water and using tongs and a towel you can make this happen without burning your paws. Beware of splattering boiling water or fruit. OUCH. Let the jars rest on a towel for 5 minutes and turn them rightsideup. Let it cool there for 24 hours and by now all seals should have popped in. When you press on the top it shouldn't budge.

JAM!

New year, new post!

2010-01-05T22:02:00.001-08:00

I hope none of you watched the season premier of the new Biggest Loser, because they keep puking! Anyway, despite the really crappy tiny cell phone photo (my camera charger was a NYE casualty), I wanted to share with you a really delicious way to ring in the new year. It starts with a full belly of resolution-friendly dinner. My boymate and I have embarked upon a new eating leaf. I know that's so cliche, but you gotta start somewhere (thanks Bob and Jillian!). Tonight I made something that almost blew my own mind. It is as follows:

Artichoke: Clip off the outer leaves, chop off the top pointed inch, shave off the outer skin from the good leaves all the way down to the stem. Pry that point open and ferociously scoop out all of the furry bits and the dots those furry bits came from. Have a halved lemon handy and rub the lemon over all surfaces of the artichoke so it doesn't turn brown and yucky. Do that to a few artichokes and place them in a sauce pan, tops down. Add half of that lemon and a smashed clove of garlic. boil for 30ish minutes until you can pull one of the outer leaves out and have it taste yummy. For a dipping sauce mix a T of lowfat or vegan mayo, a tsp of dijon or spicy mustard and a squeeze of lemon. YUM TOWN AND Z BOYS.

Tomato Pepper Soup: Chop a whole onion and a yellow pepper (in retrospect, maybe roasted pepper?), 2 cloves of garlic, add some salt & a bunch of red pepper flakes and saute in a good sized sauce pan until soft and flavory. Add a 28 oz can of whole tomatoes with their juice and a couple of cups of stock (I used chicken). Bring to boil and reduce to simmer. When everything is heated through and incorporated, blend until smooth. Return it to the pan and simmer for a few mins with the lid on. DONE and DONE.

Seafood: Go to Trader Joes and purchase a frozen bag of calamari, shrimp and scallops. It all comes together and is approximately $5. For two of us, we just needed about 2/3 of the bag (the other 1/3 can be used for the leftover soup you'll surely have!). I sauteed it without bells or whistles for about 45 seconds in a hot pan. They release a ton of water. Strain off that water by quickly dumping the seafood into a colander. Meantime, add olive oil, garlic and some thyme (my plants have provided me with lots). Return seafood to pan and cook for another minute or so. Squeeze in some more lemon and viola, DEEEELISSSHH.

Questions? Concerns?

We be jammin.

2009-08-07T10:17:00.000-07:00

So, I am unemployed again. My brief stint as a member of the temporary work force was like a bad date. I was out of the house, but I wasn't in love. So, here I am with an abundance of free time. I recently ate a cherry and an almond in the same bite and was like "I want to make a 100% homemade pb&j!" I executed (literally, so bloody!) step one in this process by making cherry jam. Here is my step by step recipe that I stole and adopted from other recipes on the internets. First you want to purchase cherries and wash them. I got bing cherries for $2.99 a pound at my local corner farmer's market store in the Mission. Very cheap and delicious.

Then you want to, well first you want to buy a cherry pitter. Highly recommended $13 purchase. You can also use it for olives. Anyway, pit all of your cherries. And make sure that all of the pits actually shoot through the center of the cherry. I had a few hangers on that I discovered later.

You also want to add a good amount of citrus. I didn't have a microplane for zesting so I peeled just the yellow part off of two lemons and finely diced it. I also squeezed their juice which I added to the pot. My jam came out really lemony which I like but you can cut that down to 1 lemon if you like.

You want to chop about 3/4 of your cherries and put them in a big stock pot (it gets real bubbly so you want room) with the lemon stuff. I added about a cup of rum. Some other recipes recommend kirsch at the end of the recipe but I mixed it up. That will need to cook for about 15 minutes until everything is all soggy. Stir frequently. Then you want to add what looks to be an absurd amount of sugar. I had 3 lbs of cherries and I used about 3 cups of sugar. It will get very bubbly, keep stirring on medium heat for about a half hour. I heard about an "am I done" test where you put a white plate in the freezer for about 10 mins. Put a teaspoon of the jam on the plate and put back in the fridge for 5 mins. If it looks jelly-like you're good to go.

The problem I had was that no one told me that it wouldn't actually look like jam when it's done. It will still be "wet." It will jam up in the jam jar. When it's still warm put it in your previously boiled jars (just put all of your jars and lids in another big pot and boil for a bit. Leave fully submerged in water until you're ready to fill the jars). Put the lids on and refrigerate forever.

Voila!

Don't hate me.

2009-06-23T12:10:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone. I apologize for ignoring you lately. There is a simple explanation for this, though it's not a pretty one. I HAVE NO MORE FREE TIME. At least for now, I am working. It is a temporary gig, but it is occupying my days. This is bitter-sweet. I miss the gym, the farmers market, my kitchen, parks, lunches, reading books, etc. For the past few weeks I have been exposed to something I had started to take for granted during my past four years of employment. At my previous job my coworkers and I were welcome to explore our personalities through fashion. We could wear whatever we liked, within reason. Some days we had fancy meetings, so we wore fancy clothes. Other days it was mellow, so we wore flip flops. I was also located a mere 2 blocks from my public transportation so I didn't get a good glimpse of the fashiony goings on in the financial district. I now have a 15 minute walk to my place of business (which shares a space with a strip club, no joke) and I am privy to all sorts of youthful outfit atrocities on their way to their first jobs out of college. You can tell the kids who are trying to patch together faux professional ensembles out of their Forever 21 stretch poly blend potato sack dresses, awkwardly comfy mall shoes, blazers their moms bought them and other items that they randomly decided were appropriate. The boys have it easy. The girls look weird. Until they get their first raise and get a fiance and upgrade to coach bags, Banana Republic and J Crew. They quit getting wasted at night so they have time to give themselves proper blow drys in the morning. No more ugly knot buns. Kids are cute, but jobs, my friends, are the opposite. I miss my free-time, at least until I find my perma-dream job.

Gazpacho.

2009-05-20T18:31:00.000-07:00

The word Gazpacho always reminds me of the Nazi police but in reality it is a tomato based chilled soup often eaten when weather is warmish. In San Francisco we have what can hardly be described as a summer between May and August. Thus, we do things like wearing sandals and having picnics when our toes are cold and the wind is blowing our napkins around to fake ourselves into thinking it's warm. One of these things, which I am preparing to do on Friday is make Gazpacho. I seriously have to keep reminding myself not to type Gestapo. Ok, here's the recipe!

8 slices white bread, crusts removed, bread broken into big chunks

2 pounds tomatoes, seeded
1 English cucumber, peeled
1 large white onion
1 green bell pepper, seeds and pith removed
2 garlic cloves, smashed
Kosher salt
High quality extra-virgin olive oil
2 to 3 tablespoons sherry vinegar
1/2 cup to 1 cup tomato juice, if needed
Directions
For the soup:
Soak the bread, in a medium bowl of water to soften, about 15 to 20 minutes. Squeeze out the excess water and place in a large bowl. Coarsely chop the tomatoes, 2/3 of the cucumber, 1/2 the onion, and 1/2 the pepper and add to the bread. Add the garlic, season with salt, and drizzle with olive oil. Mix to combine and let sit for about 20 to 30 minutes to allow the flavors to marry (soups voted no on prop 8) and to let the salt pull some moisture out of the tomatoes.
Meanwhile, for the garnish, dice the remaining cucumber, onion and green pepper into perfect 1/4-inch dice and reserve.
Working in batches, puree the tomato/bread mixture in a blender with the vinegar. Blend in tomato juice to loosen the mixture, if needed. Remove soup to a large bowl and stir in about 1/2 cup of high quality olive oil. Taste for salt and add more, if needed.
Chill. Serve cold garnished with the diced cucumber, pepper and onion. Drizzle with a little more olive oil, if desired.

Number one suggestion.

2009-05-14T22:38:00.001-07:00

My number one suggestion for those who are job-free is the same as my excuse for why I have had a dearth of posts lately. The internet is the new Judge Judy and Family Feud. Get off the computer and go outside. Some symptoms of internet addiction are: ignoring humans, boring people with inane Tweets, beginning to actually capitalize Internet because you think it deserves the same treatment as other pronouns. Between all of the blogs related to any number of fascinations you can think of, Facebook, Twitter, online banking, job hunts, e-networking, shopping, emailing, IMing and Googling, you could easily never leave the house. This is not better than watching "stories." I am not suggesting that you quit the information super highway altogether, I'm just suggesting that you get in the slow lane. Start actually talking to people. Me and my boymie need to start heeding my own advice.

Decoration for your body.

2009-05-14T14:18:00.000-07:00

I have been on a Jewelry making or at least a jewelry reconfiguring kick lately. I have also been reading a lot of blogs related to it. One of my favorite necklace makers is the Glamourai who makes extremely cute, vintage-inspired, layered necklaces sold on Etsy. I have also been addicted to ebay for cheap arm, neck and ear decor. Why not merge the two? You can purchase "lots" of things like this, this or this for a fairly low price and then either use old chains of your own or you can get chain by the foot at websites like this. With a few inexpensive tools and loop connectors you can string together a real neat necklace that people will comment on forever. You can start with a clasp, attach a quarter-inch loop and add different length chains with different pendants attached to each by smaller rings. Are you getting a picture of this in your head?

Get creative with your ebay searching, do you collect things? If so, search for "lot" and various other words for cheap collections of vintage jewelry. You can deconstruct the individual pieces and add different clasps. If you get really awesome at making jewelry, you can sell it and make money! There are tons of online shops, including Etsy and craft fairs popping up all over the place. Mission Indie Mart popped up a couple of years ago in San Francisco and has gone from a back-yard affair to a monthly big whoopsie that is perfect for selling and purchasing crafty and giftable items. Word?

Quiet please.

2009-05-05T17:36:00.001-07:00

I forgot to tell you one something really awesome for free timing. About two months ago I got a library card because I needed a good place to study for my French class and to potentially check out books. I forget how to use the Dewey Decimal System, but I am imagining computers figure that out for me now, right? Anyway, until today I TOTALLY forgot the best part of the library that I discovered on my first visit. They have DVDs of all of these awesome TV shows that I have never seen. Netflix is real neat and all, but the library is 2 blocks from my house and it's 100% free dollars. That's a job-free bargain.

Jock talking.

2009-05-04T21:25:00.001-07:00

Something you might have time to do now that you don't have a job is blog. You might be wondering why there's a photo of a buff jock above. Well, when I google'd the word "jock" a bunch of nearly naked dudes showed up. In order to spare you those, I picked this one. He's pretty non-offensive, right? You now may be wondering why I would google the word "jock." Well, friends, I am moonlighting as a sports blogger. Actually, I have been doing that longer, so technically I am moonlighting as an unemployed know-it-all. I wanted to tell you sooner about Total Jock Talk, the sports blog to which I contribute, but we've recently experience a massive upswing in NBA-playoff related posts making now the perfect time.

I suggest you run right over to that site and read all about exciting topics related to sports. If you don't like sports, perhaps you like snacking: Total Snack Attack.

I am recommending here, too, that you start a real neat blog of your own. Do you have a hobby and some witty friends? Perhaps they would like to join the blogosphere with you as well. Do you like movies? Spend your free time visiting theaters of all types. There are lots of films to be seen and matinees are slightly less wallet molesting than evening flicks. Use your blogs to critique and review movies. That is just one idea, you're smart, so you figure out what the world would most like to read about. And send me a link, I'll be sure all of the other jobless people I know read it.

DIY food stuff.

2009-04-30T23:23:00.000-07:00

I am obsessed with food blogs, cooking and attempting to save dough by making different, well, doughy items at home. I have been reading Serious Eats for some time and think it's just about the best round-up of recipe, book and restaurant reservations along with a healthy dose of food news. Anyway, they recently posted an article wherein the writer weighed the pros and cons of making certain items at home vs. purchasing them. She tackled bagels, jam, yogurt, cream cheese, crackers and granola. I don't have a mouth that enjoys yogurt or granola, but there is little I love more than brown food (carbos) with fats on top of them. I have no real need for bagels purchased or otherwise, but this article did get me thinking that I would like to create a large batch of pizza dough that I can divide into self servings and freeze for rather spur of the moment uses. I am dying to make a breakfast pizza.

I have tried to freeze soup before and while I hear people do this a lot, I am never too excited about the thawed product. I am now freezing ginger and am about to start doing herb "cubes." What else can we make at home and keep for future inexpensive meal yummies?

Get'er done.

2009-04-29T15:20:00.000-07:00

So, a few weeks ago I mentioned several odd jobs that I intended to accomplish. Here's a status report:

1. My passport is about to expire. I haven't actually sent the forms off yet. Mainly because it costs $75 to renew and I have a hard time parting with with cash for non-fun and cute related things right now. However, I got the photos taken and have everything ready to go. I will probably send it next week in case someone offers me a free trip abroad. I would hate to miss it.

2. I will defer my student loans. I did this because they started to harass me. I don't like waking up to an "Unavailable" phone call at 8am on Saturdays. Also, it was easy!

3. I am cleaning my rugs. I moved in January and have yet to unroll several rugs because they are gross. Ok, this hasn't happened yet. I tried, though. The living room rug is dead meat, I fear. Or at least it smells like it. It's beige, really fuzzy and I got it for literally nothing at a sample sale (thanks, old job.) It's also disgusting and acquired a really hideous smell when I took it outside to "air out" and accidentally left it there for 3 days. Oops.

4. I am going to make curtains. I did this! To completion! I really recommend getting plaid fabric because it makes measuring and sewing in straight lines really easy. Look how cute:

5. I am going to organize my books into cute and like-sized stacks. Yep, did this too. I love it. Boyfriend sometimes needs to ask me what color certain books are, but I have a good memory.

Just the job for you.

2009-04-28T20:21:00.001-07:00

I found this job for you on craigslist. I kind of want to apply for it. Do you?

Super busy affluent SF Arts/ Entrepreneur who travels a lot for work needs part time help finding a girlfriend/LTR. I figured that someone out there must have the skills and time to do this for me, like hiring a recruiter to help find the right employee. This is a project that might take a month or two. The pay would be $30 an hour up to $5000 with a bonus if we succeed. I am a 50 something year old fit, smart, attractive, cultured, extrovert, humorous, white guy married once no kids. And I am a quasi high profile SF person with full a biography and photos online i.e. not some closet weirdo. I’m looking for a youthful super smart stylish creative urban woman who lives in SF for LTR. That seems pretty straightforward. The job would involve finding and interviewing 5- 10 women online and in person (I am picky visually). It would take a couple months I assume.
If you are interested in this job, please send me a note and let me know why you would be good at it, why I should trust you, and how you would go about it. Confidentiality and discretion on all levels is a priority. I’ve never done this before, and I am neither patient nor experienced with online dating. You need to be SF based, college educated, smart and street savvy, with a highly organized nature, great sense of humor, refined taste and an especially good eye. You can send me a resume if you want, but this is not essential

2009-04-27T10:30:00.000-07:00

Do you guys have any jeans that are "wide-leg" or "flared" or "bell bottomed" that you no longer wear? Because if you do, I learned this weekend a way to create "skinny" jeans from these ex-favorites. All you need is some pins and a sewing machine. This is what you do:

1. Turn them inside out and put the jeans on.

2. Start pretty far up the leg so you don't get MC Hammer pants. Pin horizontally to the floor so you can pull the pins out as they go through the sewing machine's foot.

3. Keep pinning close to the outside of your leg until you get to the bottom.

4. Starting at the ankle, sew up the leg tracing your pins. Be sure to go back and forth over the hem so it's secure. I sewed the line twice so I didn't have any bust outs while I was raging in my new jeans.

5. Cut away the extra fabric leaving at least a half inch. You can iron them flat if you get weird puckery things when you turn the jeans right side out.

Awesome. You look great.

Booty Camping.

2009-04-21T09:18:00.001-07:00

So, this whole "get buff" aspect of being job-free has it's highs and lows. On one hand we have all of the time in the world to exercise but on the other, some stuff is expensive! Also, there are lots of other fun things to do with your time. It's getting to be globally warm all over the place, so I am trying to think of an economical way means by which to camp your booty at a park, a few good men style, assuming you can handle the truth. P.S. if you live in San Francisco, have you seen those "Train Outdoors." cards that seem to be strewn about the city? I almost think they are using "littering" as a form of guerilla marketing. Lame.

So, here are my suggestions on a DIY boot camp:

1. Find a park and preferably a buddy who is also job-free. I would suggest coming up with a list in advance outlining your routine. I hate that "I don't know what I am going to do so I'm going to go home" feeling. Be prepared.

2. Get your warm-up out of the way by walking QUICKLY to the park with your buddy.

3. Is there a tennis court? You can sprint back and forth on it. If not, take the sidewalk on one edge of the park and do sprints. I played b-ball in high school and there were these things we did regularly called SUICIDES. They are gnarly. On a tennis court you can start at a short end, sprint to the closest mid-line, go back, sprint to the net, go back, sprint to the far side mid-line, go back, sprint to the far end line, go back. Word? Sprint one, jog one, sprint one, jog one. Ouch!

4. Jumping jacks and "body builders" are more hard core than you'd think. There's a little animated weird thing here that I found. My ex-trainer once told me that these body builder things are what people do in jail and we know how buff jail birds are.

5. Squats are pretty much hell on earth but are also really amazing for making your butt like a peach. Who doesn't want a peach butt? You can also do a lunges version of the suicides.

6. Is there a jungle gym at your park? Or a bench? Put your feet on a bench and do sit ups for like an hour. Just kidding. But you can do pushups (plank position) and situps using a bench while trying to avoid dog poops.

I plan on doing this tomorrow at a never to be named park so no one can come laugh at me passing out on the grass after ten minutes. Baby steps, y'all.

Cheap yummy times.

2009-04-14T21:39:00.000-07:00

This post has been entirely hijacked from other sources. Thanks, pals, tablehopper and San Francisco. There are TONS of amazing entrepreneurial food makers popping up all over the city and this is happening because (a) people don't have jobs so they have time to pursue "passions" (not the soap opera, thanks), (b) other people have time to search out places to have fun despite their lack of money and (c) the internet is getting hyphy and people can take things from zero to crazy popular in 4 seconds. Here is a list of cheap places to scour for grub in the fine city of San Francisco. If you happen to live in Portland, check out their recent recap of all of the great food carts. Good stuff.

kitchenette sf

It's in Dogpatch and is run by chefs from the city's most notorious restaurants. They serve fresh, organic, spontaneous and handmade food from scratch based on what they're able to come up with the day before. It's first come first serve (11:30am-1:30pm) and located at 985 Illinois Street. Twitter: kitchenettesf

sneaky's bbq

BBQ on delivery!!!

magic curry kart (copied below from Tablehopper)

It feels like a Burning Man project that was released on city streets. Brian The Magic Curry Man will cook your Thai curry to order, but since the word is out, the line can be long (one man, two burners, you do the math). Twitter: MagicCurryKart

creme brulee kart (from tablehopper)

Who knew the Magic Curry Man has a brother, Curtis! And he's here to ply you with little creme brulee treats, with flavors like vanilla bean, chocolate Grand Marnier, and Bailey's Irish Creme. For just $3, yo. And here's a man who knows his audience: look for the Big Lebowski-inspired White Russian brulee on 4/20. Twitter: CremeBruleeCart.

amuse bouche

Delicious breakfast goodies everyday between 7:30 and 10:30am. Most everything is $1.

mission street food

It tastes good and is pretty inexpensive. My favorite part was having beverages at the Beauty Bar first. I have issues with dirty restaurants no matter how delicious. Just sayin...

A cornucopia of gifts.

2009-04-09T10:48:00.000-07:00

Because you're very popular and have tons of friends, you probably have a lot of birthdays and other reasons to give gifts. Since you're trying to be frugal while remaining a good pal, you'll need to come up with some fiscally responsible gift ideas. I have a few ideas that will help you:

1. Just send cards. Rather than sending emails or weird e-cards or simply saying "happy bday" on Facebook, make a cute card. Remember construction paper and glue sticks? Or maybe you have a fun box of cards stashed in your desk. Use them! Stamps are getting spendy, but it's not so bad. Everyone loves to get mail.

2. Photos. Do you have some great pictures that you can print and insert into a cute/cheap photo frame that you bought at a thrift store? Good gift!

3. Books. Do you have a stack of books by your favorite author that you've already read? And perhaps you have a sweet friend who also likes to read. Perhaps they would like an assortment of reading materials along with a friendly note explaining why you thought they'd like them.

4. Foods. Cook your friend dinner (and cupcakes!) Because you have all of this free time to learn how to cook you can cheaply replicate your recipe box and cook them some of your favorites.

Here are just a few kinda obvious ideas. I think you can come up with more ideas on your own. Can you sew? Paint? Draw? Provide any kind of service? Go for it!

Twitterployed?

2009-04-08T12:38:00.001-07:00

Today Forbes posted an article about using Twitter to find a job. Here are some highlights:

Make sure your account name contains something about your profession, so your feed shows up when people search associated topics.
Search for industry leaders and other people and companies in your field you’d like to know—some firms even post job openings on their feeds. Sign up to follow their tweets.
In your tweets, offer your opinions on news and seminars relevant to your career. If one of the important people you’ve been following says something notable on a professional topic, forward it or post an open comment.
If you’re following a hiring manager at a firm you’re interested in, tailor your tweets to comment on issues he or she posts about.

Courtesy of Newser.

Free time music books to read.

2009-04-06T21:51:00.000-07:00

This is a repost from Unibloggal, a blog some pals and I used to frequently vent upon. I wrote it in June of 2006, but little has changed. However, now I use proper capitalization and have more time to read. Since you may also have time for such shenanigans, I am passing this list along to you. Enjoy:

i read a lot. sometimes my friends yell at me for watching tv, riding the bus, playing my game boy, talking on the phone and/or emailing while hanging out with them AND reading a delicious piece of written word. i may, occasionally, provide you with a list of reading material that you're free to enjoy during your precious freetime. that is, when you're not injesting the satisfying content of this blog.

today's list focuses on one of my favorite genres: rock and roll music (or music in general) - auto/biographies/novels and other stories.

The Dirt: Confessions of the World’s Most Notorious Rock Band - this book was written by the members of motley crue. i called in sick one day because i couldn't stop reading this book. it was the fall of 2003, i'd just moved to san francisco and needed something to provide me with some vicarious insanity. this did the trick. and when waiting in the ambient death metal aisle of amoeba for spiritualized to play one afternoon, it was an excellent distraction from the annoying and smelly people around me.

The Long Hard Road Out of Hell - this is marilyn manson (brian warner's) autobiography. i highly recommend it because right now you probably think he's an idiot. after you read this book, you will think he's a hilarious idiot.

How Soon is Never? - this is a novel by a real life rock journalist who does drugs about a make believe rock journalist who does drugs. the make believe rock journalist tries to reunite the smiths. the real life rock journalist only got to interview morrissey, something the make beli...wait, i don't want to ruin the ending.

And I Don’t Want to Live this Life - this book was written by nancy spungen's mother. it almost made me cry...ALMOST.

Heavier than Heaven - this book really did make me cry! i was on a plane home from new york and because it was so depressing, it had taken me several months to slowly get my way to the end of this book. when i finished it, i was a teary pile of crybaby. it's excellent. and pretty much contains all of the teen angst you will ever need in a book.

We Got the Neutron Bomb - for a second, this book makes you think that maybe once upon a time LA wasn't a huge infected waste of space. but then you realize that you were wrong.

Rotten: No Irish, No Blacks, No Dogs - i ate this book up. it includes great accounts by vivienne westwood, chrissy hinde, and other females who could kick my ass. i read it in 1995 when people in orange county liked the offspring and PUNK! i felt like i was providing myself with some imaginary roots. oh, to be 18 again.

Lords of Chaos - this book is evil.

Have Gun Will Travel - in may of 2000 rolling stone published an article (the rock was on the cover) about the deaths of biggie and tupac. it was an excellent article and i was HOOKED. the article lead me to investigate more on the topic and eventually i found this book. it's VERY long and VERY detailed, but it includes accounts of every rotten thing that suge knight ever did. i'm scared of him.

Project positivity!

2009-04-06T11:28:00.001-07:00

It is spring time and I don't have a job. I have decided that it's time to partake in every project I can think of all at once. My projects might not line up exactly with yours but perhaps they will provide some ideas on ways in which your free time can become productive and filled with glorious busy work.

1. My passport is about to expire. One morning this week I will take a shower before 3pm and put makeup on. I will go have my passport photos taken and I will renew it. I have noticed that the new means of producing passports has created a washed out effect on the face so I will wear stage makeup like a Rockette.

2. I will defer my student loan. I cannot be paying that crap without a job. Easy.

3. I am cleaning my rugs. I moved in January and have yet to unroll several rugs because they are so gross. Instead of paying someone to professionally clean them, I will beat the living crap out of them with several sticks. Then they'll get vacuumed and arranged.

4. I am going to make curtains. We have french doors that separate the bedroom from the living room and we have out of town guests coming to visit. In order for them to not accidentally see butts, I will borrow a sewing machine from a friend and make something cute.

5. I am going to organize my books in cute and like-sized stacks. I am going back and forth on whether or not to do this by color. I will probably get sick of it shortly.

Photos of all photo-worthy projects to come. Cross your fingers I don't get bored.

2009-04-02T22:53:00.000-07:00

So, everyone knows that newspapers are doing really badly. And everyone also knows that there is A LOT of news happening out there in the world. I don't condone ignoring everything in an effort to be less confused, but perhaps we can all just get a bit more conscious of what we are eye-gesting and where it comes from. I will never give up my Sunday New York Times (crossword puzzle and T) but perhaps I don't need to get the paper every day. It clogs my recycle bin and despite all of the free time I have to read it front to back, it's not responsible so lucky me, the internet is like a frat party for news. You can talk to the really smart girl who's not as attractive or the cheap girl with a nice rack. This analogy really makes no sense, but I am going with it. Anyway, organizing internet bookmarks into folders that you can then focus on during certain parts of your day will help you avoid wasting 3 hours reading some asinine crap. For example, in the morning, read news. In the afternoon, visit job sites (seriously, look at all of those internships). At night, read "entertaining" blogs while you're watching crap tv (seriously, Tyra's bat crap crazy). If you are lacking excellent online reading material, ask friends what blogs read.

I finally fixed the comment function, so if you could please tell me what websites you read, I would appreciate it. I have a lot of time to kill. But not this much.

Walk it out.

2009-04-01T10:56:00.001-07:00

Several people in numerous cities have mentioned the fact that they're partaking in local walking tours as a form of cheap entertainment, mild exercise and in order to get better acquainted with their locale. My favorite source for all things bay-area food related, tablehopper, mentioned her love for these tours in this week's e-column so I thought I'd share the idea with you too. Here's a link to San Francisco City Guide, which has tours such as "Haight & Ashbury," "Pacific Heights Mansions" (probably really hilly!), "Ferry Building" and more. Live in New York? Chicago? Los Angeles? As you can see, I know how to Google things. Please feel free to do this for your own city.

What have you done lately?

2009-03-31T21:54:00.000-07:00

Has it been about 49 years since you wrote or updated your resume? This is a common fear I am hearing somewhat frequently, especially in this so called "economy" where you want to be sure you cram all of the amazing things you have done and know how to do into a few measly bullet points. How are they going to know how awesome you are?! Why don't they call me for an interview already!? What font should I use!? All of these fears are valid. I don't have a suggestion for some kind of magic class you can take where they will teach you all of these things but I do have some thoughts to help you out. One of them I outlined here.

Another thought is to get together a group of both employed and job-free friends for a resume review. Start by making your resume like 5 pages long. Just dump everything in there that you can think of. Then you can narrow it down and tailor it to fit the details of certain jobs. Once you have your friends gathered you can have them review your pared down, final one-page resume. I have always heard that it's best for everything to fit on one page. Does anyone know if this is still the case? Are there instances when it is not? Anyway, I think it's best to rely on your friend family to give you input, assuming your friends are smart and honest. Have your other jobless friends bring theirs so that by the end of the night everyone is sort of drunk on Chuck Shaw and has a solid starting point from which to land the job of their dreams. Rad, right?

Herb dealer.

2009-03-30T22:59:00.001-07:00

For about 15 years I have wanted to create my own herb garden. I have started cooking up a storm in order to save some money (does it really save money? I feel like I am spending my non-fortune on groceries), so I have positioned myself to set upon this glorious journey. I recently moved into an apartment with a small back porch that receives TONS of sunlight, that is when the sun shows it's face in this dysweathered city. It also came with a cute plant box which contains small succulents. While I'm all for cacti, they're not adding anything to my soup. Today I journeyed to Whole Foods because they have little starter plants for $2.50. I also procured some of these HerbBallz (best name!) which will occupy the box. Over the next few days I will be embarking on a full court herbaceous press. I will fill this planter and three or four small pots with parsley, chives, thyme, rosemary, basil and tarragon. This makes me infinitely happy. I am happy to share assuming I know you in real life and you're willing to barter.

For some inspiration here are some websites that may help you figure out the best way to handle this project:

From Apartment Therapy, DIY, About and EHow.

Getting springy with it.

2009-03-27T09:23:00.000-07:00

I'm sorry for the stupid Will Smith reference, I really am. However, it's hella sunny and you don't have a job. I say this is a perfect opportunity to ignore all of my aforementioned advice for responsibility and keeping busy in favor of a more flippant form of amazing fun times. Where is the nearest park? What is your favorite six pack? Do you like champagne? Are your friends able to call in sick? Do you have a bike? Are you reading a good book? Can your other unemployed friends join you? Do you have a watering hole like this one nearby? If so, please ignore Craigslist and Linked in today. Please don't even look at your bank account, budget, resume, list of chores or even your gym membership. Just go outside and chill out. However, if none of your friends can ditch their jobs today, maybe wait to open the six pack until later so you're not 109 sheets to the wind by the time they get off work. Nah mean?

Hi, mom.

2009-03-22T20:22:00.000-07:00

Despite the fact that the job-free may not have much dough at their disposal, free time is aplenty. It's a perfect time to go visit your mommy! Flights are pretty cheap right now and if you go see them they will know that you are hanging in there despite economic woes. Usually, they will make you food, give you spare toothbrushes and let you watch their cable tv. It's perfect. Anyway, if you happen to notice a dearth of posts for the next few days, it's because I am off visiting my own mommy.

Pinata party.

2009-03-20T00:20:00.001-07:00

This past weekend I attended a party which was themed "MEXICAN POTLUCK!" It was a great time and we ingested many delicious treats and a few adult beverages. Above you will likely see with your eyes a photo of a green person (s/he was slimed!) next to a beautiful bird. This bird is filled with candy, mini bottles of tequila and some other items for laughs. Some good friends jovially contributed him to the potluck, how did they know we wanted mini-candy for dessert?

I am telling you about this should you be interested in filling some of your free time dedicated to the creation of your own pinata. What could be more fun than supplying your friends with a few hearty swings? It was also discovered that it is great for the job-free to get out some of their angst and inner turmoil by swinging a stick maniacally at a paper bird whilst blindfolded. Here are your directions:

1. Inflate a/some balloon(s). You can use strong double sided tape to connect them in order to make a THORAX, if you will. You can add additional shapes like tails, noses, hats, arms, legs etc. with cardboard (paper towel innards work well!). Use not toooo much clear tape to bind everything together into a cute shape. Tie a string around one or the only balloon knot.

2. Before you start pasting, make sure you have a nice area covered in a tarp or newspaper. Don't want daddy (or mommy) to yell at you for accidentally paper mache'ing the floor.

3. Make some paste! In a big pot, mix 1 part flour and 2 parts water. Those parts can be quarts, pints, whatever you want. Whisk the ingredients together (you're not making soup!) and heat them on medium for about 3 mins until it's almost thick. Remove from heat and the pot and store in a large bowl.

4. Start tearing newspaper into strips that are about an inch wide. You want to get these wicked goopy by "dredging" them in your paste. Have you ever made fried chicken? It's like that, but don't eat it. Instead, you want to cover the balloon beast with a thick layer of these pastey strips. You will want to do this methodically so you know for sure all three layers have been applied. Be sure you are keeping track of the string. Let it sit for awhile and get all dry and hard.

5. Decorate! It's fun to use that tempra paint stuff that they sell at Wallgreens. You can also glue crepe paper on it to make eyeballs and other stuff like that. Or you can make a generic newspaper ghost. Up to you, dude!

6. Using a serrated knife, cut a rectangular flap around the string/knot. Use this hole to fill it with candy, amazing treats, cute little thingies and anything else you'd like to include. Tape the flap shut when you're done.

7. Now you just have to find a stick and a nice place to hang it by a rope. Then get friends to be blindfolded and blindly (obvs) swing at it until the contents dumps gleefully all over the ground.

Here's a video! I haven't watched it, so I hope it's accurate.

Art star.

2009-03-19T17:44:00.001-07:00

=chic.

There is nothing better than a solid trip to a museum solo style to chicly occupy an afternoon. This is by no means meant to be San Francisco centric, but an example of an amazing way to spend your time without the crowds and annoying outfit people you find at formal museum gatherings. If you prefer an evening activity, most institutions have evening gatherings targeted at marketing towards "young professionals." I remember when I worked at a museum in the early millennium and this term was over used to the point of imaginary face punching. Young Professional was the Social Media of yore. Gross. Anyway, if you like gathering with your fancy peers (who probably have jobs) you can go to evening gatherings like this. The de Young in "Frisco" has a Friday night event with bevs, art and outfits. Right now you can see the Yves St. Laurent show and for some more bones (I think) some Warhol.

Another museum related suggestion, at most institutions, for a few more bucks you can purchase a membership that will provide you access to a network of museums across the country. If you can swing it without eating hella ramen, think about it.

Black eyed peas sans Fergie.

2009-03-18T22:25:00.001-07:00

This delicious mess is AMAZING and like I said, delicious. I found the recipe here and it's CHEAP. Sorry for all of the caps, it was just that yummy and SOO easy and again, delicious. Here goes:

CREAMY BLACK EYED PEA SOUP

2 T olive oil

1 tsp whole cumin seeds (my corner store had none, so I used corriander seeds and it was YUM)

salt and pepper

red pepper flakes

4 cloves garlic, minced

1 T tomato paste (though I added 2 because I like it)

1 T chopped fresh thyme

1 can black eyed peas, drained

1 c water (I would probably add 1 and a 1/2 or 2 next time)

1/4 c sour cream

You HAVE to get everything together and ready next to the stove because it comes together in a hurry. Coat the bottom of a pan with the olive oil until it's hot. Add seeds and pepper flakes, stir 30 seconds. Add garlic until golden, but don't burn those lil nuggets. Add tomato paste and keep mixing and stirring. Add thyme until wilted, keep stirring for another 30 seconds. Add peas and fry all together for 2 minutes. Add water and bring to boil, reduce to simmer for 5 mins. Add sour cream, reduce to super low heat, don't bring to a boil again. Season and serve!

It only serves 2 people for a meal, not one of those 4 day soups. I cooked a veggie sundried tomato sausage in lil pieces and put that in the soup. YUUUMMY.

Travel by train.

2009-03-18T19:19:00.000-07:00

Okay, not that kind of subway. I was thinking more along the lines of massive exploration via local train/bus. I live in San Francisco, a city which includes TONS of various means of public transportation. For example, there are at least 20 bus routes on which I have never ridden. There are also numerous neighborhoods I have yet to explore. I recently found myself with not a single thing I HAD to do, so I hopped on a MUNI train at a given point on it's route and rode it until it ended. I hopped off, grabbed some hot chocolate (it was freezing!), took a few photos and hopped back on. While I was in parts of town with which I was familiar, I read my book. When it was unfamiliar, I just looked out the window and I stayed on until it ended on the other side of town. It was quiet, I got through a book I was reading, I saw much of this amazingly, insanely, over the top beautiful city, I took some notes about restaurants I have been meaning to visit and it only took a buck fifty out of my pocket. Solid day time activity.

Whoa, buddy.

2009-03-18T11:09:00.000-07:00

Anyone who doesn't have a job knows that there are not many options out there. I remember in 2003 when I was unemployed after a move there were at least 293 jobs per day listed on Craigslist within my given category. Now there are about 9 per day and at least 3 of them are internships. I have contemplated endlessly the future ramifications of having either a bunch of teenagers creating strategic marketing plans or of having 42 year old professional interns at work. Both are depressing. Anyway, I have recently come to the conclusion that it is necessary to take serious sweet time when applying for a job. I have started writing down the details of the job description on a big piece of paper and sitting with it for a day. I list every task and function at previous jobs that relates to each point on the description. I then use that to draft my cover letter and customize my resume. I tangle with the dilemma over whether or not I should be the very first person to apply or if I can literally sound like I have identical experience only submitted a few days after others. It's tough out there, but I think patience is key. At some point the interns will start sucking and they will need us back.

Card me.

2009-03-15T11:29:00.000-07:00

I realized the other day that I was formerly addicted to handing out business cards as a half joke, half tipsy attempt to make tons of friends. Unfortunately, when you don't have a job anymore that effort is challenged by the fact that you don't have any accurate business cards to hand out to people. Random torn up pieces of paper and gum wrappers are not hot, so I decided to order business cards. Have you heard of Vista Print? They like free magic things like business cards. Basically there are 10201010 different designs and you just pay for shipping. I assumed there were other sites where you could make this happen, so just Google "free business cards." You'll be shocked.

Anyway, thankfully last night I had a social engagement where I found myself the one person with whom I was not intimately acquainted (not like that) and decided to try out my new business card. It was pretty satisfying, not an exact replica for the feeling of confidence that comes with handing out a card associated with an actual job, but close enough!

Memorganization.

2009-03-13T11:24:00.000-07:00

In my group of friends I am the historian. I always have a camera and always have. That means i have about 923838202 photos because that number almost looks like my age. Since becoming job-free I have taken it upon myself to organize these memories into some kind of sense. Because I have spent much of the new millennium with a digital camera, Flickr has helped me to square these memories away into little "sets." I am attempting to do that with my paper (analog!) photos. Here are some ways to go about this and to in other ways make use of your mems:

Boxes: The photo above shows a birthday present my mom sent me. She organized by year (don't laugh at how many there are) photos from my entire life. The first year she put into a book with cute paper and other information. This is my favorite means of organization because you can get cute boxes (sometimes expensive) that stack easily OR you can use old shoe boxes that you "gift wrap" like you would have a text book in 7th grade. Nah mean?
Scan: This is a great way to make your memories Y2k compatible and to share them with friends. You can create Facebook albums and haunt friends of yore. With these scans you can also...
Publish: This is my favorite thing ever. A few months ago some friends and I got together and using Blurb, we created an amazing one-of-a-kind book that spanned years. These make AMAZING gifts and are actually really affordable considering the amazing final product.
Frame: I moved a few months ago and when I did I made it a point to refresh all of my photo frames. It was starting to look like I was in denial about the fact that it's not actually acceptable to assume I am still 21, so my memorial decor had to represent that. You can cheaply print photos from all of the hosting sites where you likely have your digital pictures and if you'd like, you can go opposite day and just put REALLY old pictures in your frames. It might make you feel young again. Since you don't have a job you can change them out daily. Go for it, dude.

Bottom line, memorganization (as I am calling it) is a good opportunity to acquaint yourself with new technologies, clean up, terrorize friends and decorate your house. Pretty sweet, right?

Get smart.

2009-03-12T17:19:00.001-07:00

Seriously, man. Get smart! Like take a class or something. It kind of happened on accident in my case, as I started taking a night class before I became job-free. Actually, in my class during a movie screening I partook in my first overhaul-style festival of list making. Anyway, here are some thoughts on educational endeavors with which to occupy your free time.

First aid! This is something that relatively few of us have actually done. Don't be like me. See, I assume that I already know how to do the Heimlich Maneuver and mouth to mouth resuscitation, but watching cartoon impressions and doing a lot of frenching in my 20s doesn't count. It's a good idea though!
Photo Shopping! If I had taken one of these classes before, you wouldn't have to see my ironically non-hilarious photo creations.
Foreign language! Parlez-vous francais? Oui! Who knows, maybe this will help you land a new bilingual job.
Cooking! I don't actually recommend paying for this. Instead, I think it's a better idea to invite a friend over who is a whiz at say, Indian cooking. Make that person teach you how to cook in lieu of you purchasing ingredients. You can do this cheap-like.

I was shock and awed to learn how inexpensive local city colleges are. It's like $50 a class or something ridick like that. You can also share a book with a classmate instead of buying your own. When I was employed I went the selfish and anti-social route and bought a brand new book of my own for my class. Bad move, dude!

Toot toot beep beep.

2009-03-11T18:22:00.000-07:00

This is one of my favorite soups, however I hear many people have a fear of soup made with broccoli due to the fact that...let's just say...it gives them a tummy ache. If you either have an iron gut like myself or live alone and are jobless so if your "tummy hurts" no one is there to notice. This one involves a lot of "riffing," if you will. You can really add anything you want when it comes to spices and veggies. I will italicize things that I got creative with. Word?

BROCCOFLOWER SOUP

5 c Stock (any kind you like)

5 c chopped broccoli and/or cauliflower in any ration you prefer

2 c chopped carrot

1/2 c chopped onion

spices (I used salt, pepper, dried basil, chili flakes, and this 21 flavor seasoning crap I have from Trader Joes)

1 T tomato paste

Dice veggies and add to stock. Simmer for 20 minutes and puree. It is super delicious and is relatively cheap. Yummy, right?

Free time sick.

2009-03-11T09:46:00.001-07:00

I accidentally came upon a really exciting way to stay occupied when you are job-free. You can have a birthday and go out a whole bunch, have tons of fun with your friends and then get really sick and stay in bed for three days. While this isn't awesome for the blog you started, at least you don't have to call in sick! I always hated that feeling of calling your boss and either sounding so sick that you were faking it or not sick enough for it to be believable. Anyway, if you are at home sick and can manage to make some soup, you'll be well fed and still won't have to leave the house.

Wine at your house.

2009-03-05T17:12:00.000-08:00

No, I am not recommending that you take up a career in singing or crack heading. What I am getting at here is that I think it's a good idea to get kind of drunk at home every few weeks. Grab some cheap wine and hang out at home, potentially alone. I think this is a good way to get the thoughts flowing. Don't drunk dial your ex-boss or anything with an ex- in it for that matter. Just sit around and think about what you would do if you could. Maybe write in your imaginary journal. I use the book that was previously my work notebook, as it's funny after a couple of glasses of rose to look back at the lame crap that used to occupy your every moment. Be thankful that the ridiculous work-cleaning (like house cleaning) that was plaguing you for a year is no longer your concern. Then flip to a blank back page and start writing things down. Make a page for each "bucket" I provided in one of my first posts and fill them up with notes! These wine-fueled brain dumps are excellent for getting to the heart of matters. Then, the next day have a look at your ramblings and turn them into something useful...

Warning: I don't recommend doing this everyday or before 7pm.

Cheap thrills.

2009-03-04T13:14:00.000-08:00

Do you live in San Francisco? Are you poor? If so, you have a chance to celebrate your job freedom on a school night at the Hemlock. The Onion is hosting a stand up comedy event called "Sad Broke and Scared." Beer and whiskey is free while it lasts. Email sfpromo@theonion.com with Decider Night RSVP in the subject line. Include your name in the body of the email.

NEATO!

Post-camp blues.

2009-03-04T10:44:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was LaidOffCamp in San Francisco. It was a huge gathering and I had high hopes that I would leave with some kind of amazing inspiration and also a job. Unfortunately, that didn't happen. It was quite unorganized and for someone like me who is overly regimented and likes to plan things to death, I got distracted by the mayhem and had to leave after lunch. However, before I did, I sat through one really informative session about social networking on social media sites and how to brand yourself appropriately.

John McCrea, VP of Marketing at Plaxo spoke along with Valerie Gonyea, a career consultant. They had a lot of great insight into the job hunt, considering the fact that this is the first major economic downturn with so many efficient tools to leverage one's network. Some thoughts:

Use people you DO know to make connections to people you DON'T know on LinkedIn. They list connections to certain people who are directly connected to other contacts whose companies are hiring. Request introductions through your contacts.
When trying to make connections related to a new job, don't go after the HR person but try and find out who the hiring manager is.
All networking sites should be accessible to the right people. If you have a personal blog or photo site featuring parties and running around like a freak, make that either an alias or private to only your friends/family. Plaxo has the ability to link all of your sites (Twitter, Flickr, MySpace, Facebook, LinkedIn) but you can edit accessibility so you're able to share different things with different people.
Your brand is the sum total of your education, personality, skills and expertise brought together to form an identity. In order to form an online identity, use a dashboard like Plaxo or Friend Feed to bring all of your information together in one place. And to reinforce this, use the exact same user name and photo.
Blog! Twitter!
Make your "About me" the same across all sites.
When commenting in forums, create a stamp with links to all of your appropriate sites. Comment intelligently on sites that pertain to your industry. When you sound like a serious expert, you want your LinkedIn profile to be the thing they click on to learn more about you.
Think about the descriptors that best describe who you ARE personally and what you want to BE professionally. Flush out this description and apply that to your profiles.

So, again, I feel like this was a great opportunity that was in some ways squandered. I know they were eager to have the content generated by attendees but I think some kind of expert involvement and pre-planned programming would have lent itself to a more streamlined experience. Anyway, I tried!

Kari's Carrot Ginger Soup

2009-03-03T10:55:00.000-08:00

Another pureed soup of magic comin' atcha. For a few months I would periodically notice an (ex) coworker who would transport a vibrant container of food to the kitchen for microwaving. I would often wonder what was providing my eyes with such colorful stimulation. Then, one day she brought me the recipe! I was overjoyed the first time I made it. For one, I love finely dicing things and you get to do a lot of that with this recipe. I also like zingy bowls of healthy food that makes you full. Again, done! Here's the recipe.

KARI'S CARROT GINGER SOUP

6 tsp salted butter

1 large yellow onion, chopped finely

1/4 c ginger, chopped finely

3 cloves garlic, chopped finely

4 cups stock of your choice

1 c dry white wine

1 1/2 lb carrots, chopped roughly

2 tsp fresh lemon juice

salt and pepper

sour cream on top, if you'd like

Melt butter, add onion, garlic and ginger and saute for 15 to 20 minutes until it is soft and smelling delicious. add stock, wine, lemon juice and chopped carrots. Heat to boil and cook for 45 minutes or so. Leave uncovered so it has a chance to reduce a bit. Puree the soup in your blender according to the no lid stopper/towel rule.

There is a lot of leeway here. You can add more ginger, less ginger, add some curry powder, eat it all in one batch or share it with friends.

Laid Off Camp.

2009-03-02T20:50:00.001-08:00

I previously mentioned that a lot of people are job-free. So many that things called LaidOffCamps are springing up all over the place. The website says:

LaidOffCamp was founded in January 2009 by Chris Hutchins. It is an ad-hoc gathering of unemployed and nontraditionally employed people (including freelancers, entrepreneurs and startups) who want to share ideas and learn from each other. At LaidOffCamp, attendees will discuss topics in sessions that may include: living on an extreme budget, building your personal brand, how to be a freelance consultant and more. The first LaidOffCamp will occur on March 3, 2009 in San Francisco, CA.

I am attending this gathering in the morning with another laid off friend of mine. Like the first day of school, I am a little nervous. It says it's casual but I haven't gotten out of lounge wear in the non-weekend daytime for the past month. Anyway, we decided that we will go find a very cheap bar if it's scary. The website lists upcoming camps in tons of cities nationwide, so check it out.

An artist's everything.

2009-03-02T17:36:00.000-08:00

I suggest doing/watching/reading/listening to someone's everything. Read every book by a certain author. Watch every movie directed by or staring a certain person. Ask your most artistically sound friend to make you CDs of songs by their favorite artist. In short, broaden your horizons. Taking in all of this EVERYTHING will make you feel smart, keep you from watching The View and will give you things to talk about when you get out of your pajamas to attend happy hours and the like. Here are some of my personal recommendations:

Actor: OK, you might think I am joking but I think you should watch every movie staring Angelina Jolie. But seriously, she's in some good stuff. I don't recommend going pre-Hackers but her catalog spans the spectrum from period pieces like The Good Shepherd, to action movies like Gone in Sixty Seconds (with grossy McCagey) and Wanted, to dramatic awesomeness like Girl, Interrupted and GIA. And she's easy on them eyes.
Director: If you're not familiar with the work of Nicole Holofcenter, please look into it. Not only has she directed episodes of Six feet Under and Sex and the City, but her movies Walking and Talking, Lovely & Amazing and Friends with Money are very much worth watching.
Author: I have a problem with book and author collecting. I get obsessed with reading the work of certain writers and I can't stop. Some of those I recommend are: Augusten Burroughs, Bret Easton Ellis, Alice Sebold, Douglas Coupland, James Frey and John Irving. These are mainstream authors whose books you can find used on the internet with almost zero problem. Or I can be a good citizen and lend you my copies. Just ask.
Musician: I highly recommend the work of someone named Blake Schwarzenbach. He has been in bands called Jawbreaker and Jets to Brazil. Once upon a time I addressed how I felt about his music on another blog. You can read about it here.

Regardless of which artists you choose, just invest in it. Maybe they have a biography. If this obsession doesn't tickle your fancy, maybe you can just stalk a crush on the internet. That's a fine way to pass a few days.

A woman's work.

2009-03-02T06:48:00.000-08:00

Food is expensive! Going out to eat is fun, though. Mainly because you don't have to deal with messes or think too much about it. Good news! If you don't have a job, you have plenty of time to think about it and to make your kitchen into an Eden-like haven for food mastery. I am a firm believer that you want to spend time in rooms that are organized and well assembled. A well armed and labeled kitchen will save you money in the long run and once you're well educated and armed for culinary battle your time spent watching Top Chef (darn it, Carla) can be spent admiring their mise-en-place rather than simply talking crap on Leah's baby talk and Hosea's goatee. Here are some thoughts on how to both economize and organize your food space:

Recipe box: I recently organized my recipes which had been printed onto various scraps of paper, reproduced from the internet and made up from my brain. They went on index cards and into a plastic box that cost me a whopping $2.25. My cards came with 5 dividers (they were $4 something) so I made sections for sweets, bevs, dinners, sides/salads and soups. I also color coded the name of the recipe so I would have easy access to my vegetarian recipes. Handy and cute!
Pot rack: I have meagerly kitchen storage space. It's pathetic. Therefore, I have 2 racks for pot and pan storage. It looks "restaurant kitchen-chic" and I don't have to stack them awkwardly at ankle height only to fold myself in half each time I need to use one. I also recommend those stacky bowls from Crate and Barrel. I have never used anything more, except for that little tiny one.
Pantry power: I am obsessed with storage containers that hold food that people actually eat. Not just weird spaghetti canisters whose contents are older than...well, me. I mean functional containers for things like lentils, quinoa, cous cous and other assorted items. These things are usually very inexpensive and can turn themselves (with your help) into magic dinner. Stock up and force yourself to be a slave to your pantry.
Potlucks!: Now that your kitchen is organized, well stocked and you are smart in the ways of a host of recipes, you can have a potluck. I was told recently that the potluck is BACK, so look into it, people! They're cheap, you can insist that everyone bring copies of the recipe for their dish and if people get too drunk they can sleep on your couch.
Dishwasher: Remember the person you got to rub your feet? Ask them to do the dishes!

Neat, huh?

Namaste!

2009-02-27T09:11:00.000-08:00

Let's be honest, some parts of being job free aren't as chic as others. If you're human, you will stress out and sometimes that will lead to a bad mood or perhaps you will accidentally eat a bag of cashews while watching American Idol (Adam Lambert is my new gay boyfriend). That will make you feel gross when you wake up the next morning. Today (thanks, em!) I found that Yoga is a great way to (a) feel less nutty in the gut (OOH!) and (b) less grumpy. One issue with trying to keep up with such activities while unemployed is moolah. Here are some thoughts on how you may be able to contort your bodies into fun shapes for relatively little dough:

Community classes: Many yoga centers have classes throughout the week that only require a donation. For example, in San Francisco Laughing Lotus has a series of classes at 2:30pm Monday through Thursday. These are donation based and I believe all of the money goes to a local charity. This is what I call killing two bucket birds with one stone!
Yoga to the People: This is a studio which hosts strictly donation based classes. They have locations in New York and Berkeley. I am sure with a quick google search (see above), you can find inexpensive classes in your 90210.
Free Podcasts: I discovered these the other day whilst perusing ITunes. There are tons of these available for subscription so that you can do yoga in your bedroom (and/or in your undies!) I just found this site which offers a whole bunch of podcasts and tutorials with helpful images to assist in proper execution. Not in a murdery way, though.
Cable TV: So cable isn't free, but if you're using it to get buff, it is serving multiple purposes. If you wake up early (it's good for you, sometimes) I guarantee that there will be no fewer than 5 variations on the yoga TV show. Some are set on the beach, others are hosted by bald men in stretchy pants who listen to Sting, and yet others still are geared towards more elderly viewers. In my opinion that's both a blessing and a curse, I don't like being out stretched by grandmas. No offense.
Volunteer: I am going out on a limb here, but I am thinking that some places would likely trade an hour or two of classes if you have some skill you can offer them. Maybe you are a marketing maven and can bring in 10 new members, clean the bathrooms or work the front desk for a few days?

Anyway, I am hopeful that these suggestions will bring you inner peace, fill some serious free time and kill those random jobless grumpies that pop up from time to time. Namaste.

In good times and bad times.

2009-02-26T21:56:00.000-08:00

I apologize in advance for the photo. I couldn't help myself.

At a later date I will get more serious on how and where you may be able to donate your time to a worthy and local cause. For now I am doing some pondering on the home-front. I am going to be optimistic and assume all of my readers have a robust and valuable friend family. These are equally as important as an actual family (and usually less annoying/way more fun) and if you don't have one, please email me for tips on how one may be obtained.

OK, so assuming you have friends, there are several ways in which time can be chic-ly filled. For example:

Babysit: I am not a parent, but if I were I would miss going to movies. Movies are an excellent place to be in the dark while not talking (unless you're annoying...and if you talk in movies maybe that's why you may not have a friend family) and enjoying people on the screen who are prettier than me. If you have friends with babies, perhaps you can volunteer your time babysitting their rug rat(s) so they can go not talk to one another for a couple of hours. Who knows, maybe they'll order you a pizza (free dinner).
Personal Assistant: I have a friend (hi, M) who recently bought a house. She watched me fill out unemployment paperwork with ease and confidence which led her to lament the fact that I was gainfully employed when she was in the purchasing process. Had I had all of this free time then, I could have helped her with paperwork. Have a stressed out friend? Maybe you can run errands or in some other way make their employed life easier.
Wedding Planner: Do you have a friend who is getting married (don't we all)? Perhaps you can assist them in some aspect of the planning. I don't know first hand but it seems like wedding planning is very detail oriented. Since you didn't lose your job for being un-detail oriented, perhaps you can put those skills to use. And when the wedding is amazing, they will always remember your hand in their special day. Ok, that's selfish.
Street Team: Do you have any artist or musician friends who are trying to "make it big?" Perhaps you can manage their Myspace or Facebook page. Or volunteer to photograph their next "gig." Or in some other way put all of your talents to their good use. Again, when they're rich and famous, they will remember your friendly philanthropy.

Again, just some thoughts. Do you see where I am going with this? Basically, offer to do the stuff that normally falls outside of simple good friend duties. While using your time to be a chic awesome friend, you will in turn make a friend's life better.

And obviously, this is an open invitation to any of my friends who are reading. Ask away!

Organization nation.

2009-02-26T09:20:00.000-08:00

There are several closet-related projects that can fill time and if you have good crap, make you some money! When I am doing a good closet re-org I prefer to take EVERYTHING out of it. I then restock it first by frequency of use, then by type of item and then color. I really like it when things are color coordinated within those other little groups. It makes me feel bourgeoisie even though I only have like 15 things in my closet. Anyway, here are some tips on how to make a day of reinventing your closet.

DRY CLEAN EVERYTHING: I think this is a really good idea because you never know when you'll want to wear a sassy dress to a Tuesday matinee. I don't know about you but I have an item or two that I don't dry clean after each use and perhaps those things have weird smelling pits. Or maybe not, just a thought.
ADDRESS YOUR SHOES: If you don't wear them and if they are not beautiful pieces of art, get rid of them. There are certain items that bring down the overall awesomeness of your collection. If they are yucky and can be fixed, take them to a shoe fixer.
GET GOOD HANGERS: The nice-ish plastic ones with hooks and spots for holding your strappy items are cheap. Personally, I HATE wire hangers, mommy dearest.
If you have a lot of good stuff that you simply have no use for, sell them. If you're like me and can't stand the rejection that happens when the preteen at Crossroads denies the purchase of your treasures, CREATE AN EBAY STORE. There are websites that provide tutorials on how to do this. You can market it on your Facebook page, via email to your friends across the country and through the blog you now have time to create.

So, now that you have a streamlined and clean closet space, you can fill it back up again with cheap treasures you discover on thrift store missions. I haven't been a dedicated thrifter since I turned about 25, but I think it's a hobby worth revisiting. Recession-chic.

Job Huntress.

2009-02-25T17:11:00.000-08:00

Ok, so maybe this isn't what my job hunt looks like, but I can use my imagination. Imagine that skull is the amazing job you are going to get. It never stood a chance, right? But how did you go about beheading it and making it your own? Here are some thoughts:

Who is the connector in your group? Who knows everyone? Buy them a (happy hour) drink and pick their brain. Ask them to introduce you to people who work in fields that interest you. I think it's called networking, but that is for losers. You're a winner.
Make a HUGE list of every company you like. Which brands are you loyal to? Who are their competitors? Where do your friends work? Can you have them bring you to work for a day to see if you like their job? Make this list LONG and detailed.
What are your hobbies? I like to cook so I have been trying to figure out whether or not culinary school is a good option for me. I also like eye shadow, so maybe that could be a job for me? Get my point? You don't have to stick to what you were doing. Maybe you'll take a pay cut. Maybe you'll also be happier.
Update all of your profiles. Make your LinkedIn profile robust and detailed. Make your facebook and myspace profiles private. When you had a job it didn't matter as much if your boss saw something embarrassing. You don't likely want to be considered for a job based on your ability to write a witty status update. Know what I'm sayin?

I will get into some more detail about these things later, these are just some ideas to start kicking around. I think the most important thing here is, don't look for a job for 8 hours a day the first week you're unemployed. That will make you sad and may lead to feelings of hopelessness which is the opposite of chic.

Yummy!

2009-02-25T12:24:00.000-08:00

I am a firm believer in soup. It obviously exists and it is seriously delicious while also being extremely inexpensive. Usually by the time you have eaten the whole pot for several consecutive meals you will hate that soup and will need another on hand. The good news is, that hatred subsides and you can return to said soup at a later time. I would like to use this blog as a forum for soup lovers, unemployed or not. Please feel free to email me (erinleighbrownATgmail.dot.com) with recipes, photos of your creations and any ideas on cheap eats that can be made in a large pot. Here is the first of many delicious baby food-like treats for your poor, yet discerning palate.

BUTTERNUT SQUASH AND BROWN BUTTER SAGE SOUP

1 large butternut squash

1 bunch of sage (10-12 leaves. the more the better, really)

2 TBS of butter (if you want to turn the soup into liquid crack and you're skinny, add more)

1 box (4 cups?) stock (i use veggie but feel free to meat it up)

salt and pepper (to taste, as they say)

Halve the squash and bake it for about an hour on a cookie sheet. I like to sprinkle mine with olive oil, salt and pepper. Let it cool. Meantime, melt the butter in a soup sized pot. When it's foamyish add the sage and stir it until it smells like magic and turns slightly brown. If you time this right you can then add the squash straight away. Scoop out the guts of the squashy beast and add them to the pot. Stir the pasty creation that you now have. Add the stock and heat for about 5 mins. Let it cool for a few minutes and add it to the blender without that middle piece in the lid. Instead cover that hole with a kitchen towel. Blend it until your blender starts to smell like a burning motor (maybe that's just mine). Dump it back in the pot and try not to eat it all standing up in the kitchen.

These sound like inexact instructions but that is because this soup is really that hard to mess up. And it tastes yummy with toasty pitas or sprinkle with crushed hazelnuts and other accouterments you may have laying around. Yummy!

Getting seriously buff.

2009-02-25T01:38:00.000-08:00

Ok, not that buff. But seriously, when I was 18 I went to four hours of basketball practice per night and I had no other choice in the matter, as stoner kid didn't fit with my wardrobe. Since then I have never had adequate time with which to spend on my bod. Years of desk sitting will (a) spread your ass out and (b) make you convinced that you need a 1,000 calorie mid-day meal consisting of Chinese buffet or large cheese filled sandwich. Neither are awesome. Thus, I feel that all of this time spent not working can be filled with LOTS of kinds of buffing. The first and most obvious suggestion is, WALK EVERYWHERE! You're not going to be late if you leave early enough, so hoof it.

The second is...DON'T BE MAD....go on some weird diet. Like a juice fast, or be vegan for a week. Or only eat clear soups and grapefruits. These are things that are next to impossible when you work in a "downtown," as that is code word for "every kind of lunch you can imagine right at your fingertips." Not only are you downtown, but you have coworkers who will question you to death about WHY THE EFF YOU WANT TO GET SKINNY WITHOUT THEM. Also, contrary to popular belief, you wont die. I swear. One time I didn't eat anything but light beige liquids for 5 days and although my eyeballs turned a weird color, I didn't die. Why not just try it?

For the record, I have way way way better ideas for sustained buff gathering that I will be sharing shortly. Truth be told, I had a couple of (free) beverages with a pal from the aforementioned basketball days and this seemed like the most controversial thing to share with you this evening.

DIY Mani-Pedi.

2009-02-24T14:13:00.000-08:00

One of my favorite splurges is a top notch mani-pedi at Polished Lounge. It's tres shabby chic and they have yummy smelling balls for your foot water (don't eat them). However, it's expensive! Though I spent my first afternoon of job-freedom in a cozy chair being exfoliated, I decided that from now on I will be doing my fingers and toes at home. Though, I had to stock up on some necessities in order to accurately replicate the experience.

Good paint: I am obsessed with the Sephora/O.P.I. colors. They're $9 but you can invest in a signature color and I don't know about you, but I love using the whole bottle of something. Try and use a whole bottle of polish before it turns into colored cottage cheese.
A masseuse: If you don't have a significant other who is impressed by how clean you are keeping the house since you don't have a job, go to a cheap happy hour and pick up a hot person to rub your feet. I don't recommend craigslist, kinda creepy, ya know?
Hot towels: Stick em in a pot of really hot water with a few drops of lavender oil. Not too hot. You can also microwave lotion for 15 seconds.
Don't forget top coats. I think that's what makes it loooook professional.

I know it's not the same, but it's winter so if all else fails, keep your boots on. And if nothing else, if you do it at home, you won't be sad when that $20 mani chips three days after you got it.

Don't be bitter.

2009-02-24T08:36:00.001-08:00

Don't be bitter. I think this is the hardest part about losing your job, being let go, suffering from a "downsize." I was "eliminated," which reminded me of one of those dating shows on UPN where people go to hot tub establishments, gross. Anyway, a healthy amount of pouting is to be expected, but it was my personal mission not to be a bitter baby about the whole event. I don't work there anymore, therefore the goings on there really don't concern me. I mean, gossip is neat but being mad about what's happening in your absence is just weird. Right?

So, that said, here are my tips for the first week of joblessness:

apply for unemployment - duh! read all about it, educate yourself.
do your chores before bed, waking up to a clean house will do wonders for the daytime blues, which brings me to my next and most important point...
DO NOT WATCH THE VIEW, OPRAH, MAURY or anything else that reeks of MASH.
create a new routine...spend some time with your lists, fill up your buckets.
second most important, SLEEP IN!

Where to start?

2009-02-23T16:53:00.000-08:00

I think there is something significant to be said about a good list. Last night when I decided I was going to create this blog, after too much Oscar party champagne, I made a massive list of my own. The original list I created which is the inspiration for this brain dump could essentially be categorized into a handful of buckets. They will be the basis for all things Free Time Chic and they are:

1. Budget: I decided to figure out what I had in savings in attempt to outline how long I could keep up a "lifestyle." It's not 2006 anymore, it's time to cut back on some things. I also had to think about how many weddings, birthdays and previously committed events I had on the horizon...and so on.

2. Job Hunt: I believe this should only be done in moderation. Resume organization, recommendations, craigslist, Linkedin etc. I still need to figure out by which date I NEED to get a new job. In due time.

3. Get Buff: I now have no other excuse than to go to the gym every day. Period.

4. Make Something Yummy: Restaurants are delicious, but so is food you can make at home. There are so many excellent farmers markets and online resources for recipes that you can easily save money while saving restaurant nights for special occasions.

5. Cozify Your Home: There are lots of things at your house that can satisfy your instincts and occupy gobs of that new free time. More on this later.

6. Donate Your Time: Art gallery? Children's charity? Neighborhood organization? They would probably love your help!

7. Entertain Yourself: I almost forgot this important necessity. Having fun is probably the most important thing in the world, at least in mine.

So that about sums it up. I hope this doesn't start sounding like school. That will be my goal for the next post. Until tomorrow...

No job? No problem!

2009-02-23T09:29:00.000-08:00

I am newly job-free and I heard on the news that some others are in the same boat...something about a recession? Weird. In my case, I had some notice of my impending professional doom so I spent an evening making a list of everything I have been putting off, the details of my life I had been ignoring, my hobbies which had been swept aside and of some activities that might help regulate my worldly karma since I had spent the last 5 years with professional tunnel vision. This list gave me hope so on my first day of freedom, I was armed.

In this space I will share some of my ideas, crafty ways to fill all of this new free time. It's in no way meant to be a testimonial of all of the amazing things I am doing for the world, but an outline for things that may help to keep those feelings of uselessness at bay. Your job never defined you, you are as talented and smart as you were before you lost your job and there are TONS of us out there in the same boat. Besides, all of your friends who have jobs are jealous of your new life. You can make your free time chic.

image from natalie dee.